Category Archives: Satire/Greek Tragedy

May the Gods Have Mercy On Us!

Laloo Prasad Yadav says that he wants to be the Prime Minister of India

Update: Sakshi is thrilled at the prospect of Laloo as PM.

“But what if Laloo Prasad Yadav really does become the Prime Minister of India in (hopefully distant future – I am dead.) the coming future; one can expect P.T classes in school to be replaced with Milking Cow Training sessions, Mumbai to be replaced with Patna as the commercial hub of the country, abolishment of the Family Planning law, Bhojpuri films to rule over Bollywood.

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Filed under India, Indian Politics, Satire/Greek Tragedy

Ab Dilli Door Nahin!

The latest casualty in the name change mania that is raging across the country since the last decade is Bangalore along with 10 other cities in the state of Karnataka. Henceforth Bangalore will be called as Bengalooru alongside Mysore- Mysooru, Mangalore- Mangalooru, Shimoga- Shivamogga, Belgaum- Belagavi, Gulbarga- Kalburgi, Hubli- Hubbali, Hospet- Hosapete, Chikamaglur- Chikkamagalooru, Bellary- Ballary and Tumkur- Tumakooru.

Before Bangalore became Bengalooru the country saw Trivandrum becoming Thiruvanthapuram along with 7 other cities in Kerala whose names were also changed at the same time, Bombay becoming Mumbai, Madras becoming Chennai and Calcutta becoming Kolkata.

The reason why this is being done NOW is because of those damned brits. They ruled this country for nearly 190 years(1757-1947) and yet never developed the intrinsic tongue muscles necessary to pronounce tongue twisters like Bendakaaloru, Mahisasurahuru, Mumbadevi etc…. and hence they following the wisdom of that age old proverb which says When you cannot do as the Romans do when in Rome, make the Romans do what you want to do and sneakily pulled down all the signboards at the middle of the night and changed the names of many places to suit their own stiff inanimate tongue.

But on the positive side the brits did find a way to enjoy the searing hot indian curry and pickles with a fire extinguisher at hand and an ambulance parked outside. They also wisely replaced toilet paper in their loos with a water hose like the locals just to be on the safer side.

So the main question here is how long before someone gets a brainwave about renaming the capital city of India, Delhi as Dilli, the Hindi pronounciation of the name? Not very long i suppose. With a increasingly beseiged, failing and incompetent leftwing UPA Government at the center it won’t be long before the tinkering heads at the UPA currently busy with trying to tinker with all the laws, norms and the constitution and coming up against the stonewall of a disapproving supreme court and an increasingly irate Indian people might try its hand at a little bit of chauvinism itself perhaps at a date closer to the General Elections scheduled to be held now a couple of years away in 2009 to improve its dwindling chances at the polls.

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Filed under City, India, Indian Politics, Indian States, Satire/Greek Tragedy

Bangalore Fracas!

The hottest news out of Bangalore right now is the fracas involving two ViP kids. This particular bunch especially in our socialist mai-baap sarkar run country has a uncanny knack of getting into trouble and as usual their “illustrious” parents are always around to cover up and clean up after them with an impotent police force looking the other way; always ready to fudge the books in the hope of pleasing their masters and get a quickie promotion and a plum posting of their choice where they can line their pockets with full gusto.

Adam bidappa son of the “illustrious” fashion designer Prasad bidappa supposedly beat up a cop who either threatned or bad mouthed him and the employees of Hotel Empire allegedly beat up the grandson of the “humble farmer” who threatned and badmouthed them.Both incidents seem to have happened in the dead of the night when the sane, “respectable” people of the IT powered Garden city have gone home either to sleep or surf porn.

Before we go any further let me stress that there are no saints in this drama. There is no need to feel sorry for anyone here. kindly save your pity for some real deserving, hard working, honest, god fearing people on Mother Earth.

Today evening i was in Church street, ya the same one where that Hotel Empire is located. I saw a couple of policemen fully armed and dangerous with a .303 flung behind one of the cop’s back serving and protecting us in their own way. Mind you they have no guts to take on a 19 year old kid driving around a swiss hummer without a license just because he is the son of the current CM of karnataka and grandson of the former PM of India. They had instead picked on someone their own size, a bunch of college kids in a run down Maruti 800 who perhaps did not have influential dads who could get them out of a tight spot.I doubt very much whether they would have touched them if they were in a swiss hummer instead.

The latest news is that the police are trying to cover up the Nikhil Gowda incident but have arrested Adam bidappa. The Bangalore Police might be one of the most lazy, incompetent and head to toe corrupt police forces in the country, but they also are quite politically savvy. They know the CM’s/former PM’s son is out of bounds but Adam a mere fashion designer’s son is fair game atleast until some ViP makes that filmi phonecall and says Let him go in lieu of ofcourse a plum posting of their choice where they can line their pockets with full gusto.

Oh! how did we miss this one? There is one more incident involving yes another ViP kid, this one a former CM’s relative.Full cover up oops…. “investigation” is underway.

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Filed under City, Indian Politics, Indian States, Law & Order, Satire/Greek Tragedy

Absolutely Shameful and Ridiculous!

PM Manmohan Singh seems to have caved in and lost it completely. He should be urgently hospitalised for a nervous breakdown rather than just a stockholm syndrome.

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NEW DELHI (Reuters) – A proposed India-Pakistan pact to jointly fight terrorism deserves a “fair trial”, Indian Prime Minister Manmohan Singh said, but would be “threatened” if Islamabad does not “do more to curb” militant groups.

Frankly this fellow simply doesn’t remember or know or wish to be reminded of what happened to all such magnanimous gestures made towards Pakistan starting from MK Gandhi’s gesture of giving 50 crores of Rupees to Pakistan while it was engaged in Ghazi style raids in the erstwhile princely state of Kashmir to the Tashkent appeasement by LB Shastri to the Shimla appeasement by Indira Gandhi right down to the Lahore appeasement by AB Vajpayee.

“Fair trial” my foot!!

“I do think it is a new beginning. I hope it works, but if does not work, then also we have to deal with the consequences,” Singh told reporters on board his aircraft before he returned to New Delhi late on Monday.

This one ranks right up there with Chamberlain’s “Peace in our time” appeasement of Hitler and the consequences will have to be dealt by us not by a 75 year old man who might not live very long. But then our entire political and bureucratic establishment is made up of such cowards whose only bravery if any is in their criminal records where they might have beaten up some professor or shutdown valentine day’s celebrations or at the most killed or maimed someone who was too weak to resist.And when they are confronted with real demons they are programmed to just cave in and Submit.

“Islamabad rejects Indian allegations that it allows its territory to be used for organizing militant attacks in India.”

Nothing has changed. Pakistan will simply stonewall and lie to his face. What the hell is he going to do about it? This bloody agreement is practically DEAD ON ARRIVAL.

and this man was so unnerved that he meekly parroted Bush and Blair’s line that “Pakistan too has been a victim of terrorism”.

Can he give one single example of Pakistan having been victimised by “Foreign sponsored terrorism in a sustained way”. Most of the so called “terrorist acts” on Pakistani soil have been largely Shias and Sunnis gunning for each other’s throats or the Paki Army going riot against its own in East Bengal, Sindh, Balochistan, PoK etc…

And it has been just 2 years since this useless government came to power. We have 3 more years to endure.

Former Phillipines President Fidel Ramos was right when he said that “Six years was too little for a good president but too long for a bad one”. Likewise 2 years has already been too much for this pathetic guy who became India’s PM ONLY because there was no better peon available to do Sonia Maino Gandhi’s bidding.

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Filed under Governance, India, Indian Politics, Liberal Extremists, National Security, Satire/Greek Tragedy

Mushy signs “Peace Treaty”?!

Mushy our “friendly” neighbourhood dictator never ceases to entertain. I have been ROTFL 🙂 since i heard this bit of news. If only “peace treaties” were as entertaining as this one history classes would have been more interesting.

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And to add to the mirth the dumb Americans and the “International Community”seem to have fallen for this rope-a-dope trick hook, line and sinker.

The White House also defended the deal, saying Pakistani President Gen. Pervez Musharraf’s government “has been very cooperative in helping track down members of al-Qaeda.””There’s been an implication that somehow this throws open the border area to al-Qaeda. That does not make sense for the government of Pakistan,” White House spokesman Tony Snow said, responding to reporters’ questions in Washington.”We don’t believe it is the case,” he said. “And I think what’s happened is, as quite often happens, people try to connect dots that aren’t there.”

Read this and roll.

Pakistan signs peace deal with pro-Taliban militants

Critics say treaty, which calls for end to terrorist actions, seems ‘a total capitulation’ by Islamabad.

The dhimwits don’t seem to get it do they? Pakistan or Mushy are not capitulating to anything. The Paki Army is perfectly capable of hunting mountain rats. The Murder of Nawab Akbar Khan Bugti is proof positive of that.

Let’s see what the terms of this so called “Peace treaty” are.

1) The Utmanzai tribe of North Waziristan Agency have committed that Personnel of army and law enforcing agencies and state properties will not be attacked.[meaning Pakistan rangers and border guards “guarding” the Pak-Afghan border to prevent the NATO forces from crossing over the border to attack Al-Qaeda in Waziristan. hmmmm….i think AQ & Co will “respect” this term]

2) No target killing shall be carried out [hahaha 🙂 they are terrorists they do mostly indiscriminate killing]

3) No parallel administration will be established in the area. [Then who are u signing a “peace treaty” with? Are u not recognising them as a “parallel” administration already?]

4) No cross border movement to Afghanistan for militant activities will be carried out and no ingress in settled areas adjacent to North Waziristan Agency will take place [Translation- NATO forces will not be allowed inside Waziristan]

5) Similarly they have resolved that all foreigners in North Waziristan will leave Pakistan[ Al Qaeda get out!!] , albeit those who are unable to do so for certain genuine reasons[Wait! Wait! on second thoughts please stay back and enjoy our “hospitality”] shall respect law of the land and abide by all conditions of the agreement. They shall not disturb the peace and tranquility of the area.

An eminent American blogger called Marc Schulman has this to say about the “treaty”.

One possibility-the most hopeful possibility-is that, with the withdrawal of Pakistani troops from the North Waziristan, it would be easier for our troops to cross the Pakistani border in search of bin Laden without raising the ire of Pakistanis living in government-controlled areas.

Yes ofcourse just like Mushy has provided access to AQ khan he will let u have AQ laden too. 😉

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Filed under India and the World, International Politics, Pakistan, Satire/Greek Tragedy, Terrorism, The Indian Subcontinent

The name is Annan. Kofi Annan

For asking the Fox to guard the Chicken House. Kofi Annan is the Weirdo of the Week.

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The U.N. chief said that if Syria “follows through in tightening control of the border”, peace efforts will be greatly helped.

“I have no reason to believe it will not be done,” Annan said.

Ouch! that was too much 😦

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Fox, something tells me that you didn’t come here just for the ping pong…

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Filed under Humour, Just Plain Weird, Satire/Greek Tragedy

Fatwa on Life Insurance?!

I was dumbfounded when i read this.Deoband’s latest fatwa: Muslims can’t insure

The Darul Ifta of Deoband, the body authorised to issue fatwas, issued a fatwa saying that interest earned on bank deposits as well as insurance of life is illegal as per the Shariat, the supreme law for Muslims. And that Muslims should not go in for insurance or assurance of life which has been given to them by Allah.

The fatwa, issued by Mohammad Zafeeruddin non August 7, in consultation with the two muftis of Darul Uloom, Deoband says: “Life insurance is not permissible because there is interest income in it as well as gambling, which are illegal under Shariat.”

The fatwa was issued in response to a question from one Saleem Chisti from Lucknow who was approached by an insurance company to buy a policy and become an agent.

Do these guys have any idea of what they are doing? In this day and age can any family do without insurance? what if the primary bread earner in the family gets incapacitated or dies all of a sudden? who will feed their families, educate their kids and marry off the daughters?

And why is there not even a murmur of protest from our “sickular” politicians or our hyperactive leftist-liberal media? Where is medha patkar, shabana azmi, Arundhati Roy, Barkha Dutt, Sagarika Ghose? Why have they not said anything at all?

If some religious leader from the majority community had given a similar absurd ruling then surely these “sickular” cabal would have raised a massive hue and cry by now. But when it comes to Islamic fundamentalists……..never mind.

Here is a little background on the Deoband. They are quite a influential seminary. So influential infact that they are the ideological basis of the Taliban. Now we all know what the Taliban did during their rule in Afghanistan.

Update: Mohib of IndianMuslims.in has also posted on this controversy- Things People Do And Stuff Journos Make Up

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Filed under Indian Politics, Liberal Extremists, Media, Satire/Greek Tragedy, Social Issues